What Is a Life Worth Living?
What is a life worth living? What is life for?
Earlier this week, I finished listening to the audiobook version of Ocean Vuong’s latest book, The Emperor of Gladness. What a beautiful piece of art. In parallel with reading the book, I’ve also been listening to interviews with him about it.
I opened with those two questions because the book tells the story of someone who doesn’t break out of their small town, someone who doesn’t fulfil the American dream. Ocean wanted to capture that story—because, for one reason or another, most people don’t “break out” of their original environment and live up to the promise of the so-called American dream. Most people live ordinary lives.
I also ask those questions because of the people I knew who passed away on the Air India plane that crashed last week.
In my own life, this reality shows up in my parents. Every Monday, either walking to or from the gym, I call them to check in. Neither of them work—they’re both on benefits. Thank God for the Norwegian welfare system. They’re both unwell, and most of their days are spent watching TV, babysitting my cousins and nephews—and that, seemingly, is the shape of their life now. Of course, there are other elements to it, but those things take up large swathes of their time.
Does their life add value? Can we “measure” the value of someone’s life? Through productivity? Taxes? Creative output?
I ask again—what is a life worth living? What is life for?
These are some of the reflections swirling around in my mind at the moment.
In the midst of it all, I am one of the ones who left. I’ve built a life I largely get to shape, and one that I deeply enjoy.
But there’s a price to that. A mountain of student debt. No pension savings to speak of. The cost of working for myself is real. And yet—I chose it. I take full responsibility and accountability for that, and I wouldn’t have any other way.
Moreover, I have the safety of knowing that if everything goes pear-shaped, I have a network of support around me, and that is a real privilege.
So here’s sage wisdom I want to leave you with:
As often as you can, reframe “I have to” into “I get to.”
“I get to see the people I love one more time.”
“I get to go to the gym.”
“I get to be someone’s friend.”
“I get to have a job.”
Instead of rushing to judge others, hold back when you can—because you have no idea what it’s like to live inside someone else’s mind. This doesn’t mean accepting harm—it simply means not wasting your creative energy on judgment.
Try to step away from seeing people through the lens of a zero-sum game or capitalist productivity. Of course, we all have a part to play. But it’s not always that binary. We must leave room for nuance.
💛 I love sharing my thoughts, feelings and ideas with you, and I hope you find them useful. I would greatly appreciate your support with a paid subscription.
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