Reflections on dealing with uncertainty
I often hear this sentence from my clients: “I am incapable of dealing with uncertainty and the unknown. When I think about the future, I become very anxious.”
You are not alone. Most people, myself included, can become anxious about the future. If the last few years have shown us anything, everything can change from one day to the next.
It seems that being anxious is hardwired into us so that we at least do some planning for the future. My primary source of anxiety is financial stability. I’m pretty good at handling the rest, and it rarely turns into difficult thoughts and feelings.Slow down. Whenever I become too anxious, I intentionally slow down, create space to meet those anxieties for a while, and then process them through journaling, talking, reaching out to friends, breathing, visualisation, meditation and reminding myself of all the stuff in my life that I am grateful for. Not as a way to spiritually bypass but to remind myself that there are many good things in my life.
Don’t give too much power to your anxiety. As I said earlier, being anxious is hardwired into us; historically, it has helped us survive and preserve our species. However, as conscious modern human beings, we can now take some control over how much power we give to our anxieties. If a particular person and experience makes you anxious, then set a boundary around how much they/it get in your life.
Redefine success. Suppose your definition of success is having two houses, three cars, and five expensive holidays yearly. In that case, you are most likely going to have to be someone who works long hours, with impossible deadlines and in a very competitive environment. So much of our anxiety comes from needing to “keep up with the Joneses” and striving for achievements that are not aligned with our authenticity. I’m not suggesting that we go live in a hut in the forest, but we can be content with consuming a lot less. You get the gist.
Practice stillness. I meditate twice daily without fail. Each session lasts about 20-30 minutes on most days, but it may be as short as 10 minutes on other days, depending on my schedule. Still, I do something every day to check in with myself and gain perspective, as losing perspective causes the most anxiety.
Process the past, and let it go. The past has already happened; the only thing we can change about it is the stories we tell ourselves. Yes, many of us have experienced the most horrific experiences, and that has left us with frozen psychic trauma energy within our mind, body and spirit, and we need to support each other to let that go. But that is the thing: we must do what we can to process it and let it go so it does not ruin our present. If this is you, then it might be a good idea to seek professional help.
Take action. A tremendous amount of the future will unfold how it will, but there is also so much we can influence. The best antidote to anxiety is taking action. You can definitively impact the outcomes in your life.
Ask for help. If it becomes too overwhelming, talk to someone about it. Asking for help is not a weakness, it is creating connections to other people. We are here to help each other and collaborate so that we can make a better world together.
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