On Fitting In
I have rarely felt that I fit in anywhere, and you know what, as an adult, I see that as a great strength. To be able to stand alone in my authenticity without feeling lonely.
Once again, I am reminded of a quote by Brene Brown, who says, “True belonging is the spiritual practice of believing in and belonging to yourself so deeply that you can share your most authentic self with the world and find sacredness in both being a part of something and standing alone in the wilderness. True belonging doesn’t require you to change who you are; it requires you to be who you are.”
SOME OF THE WAYS I DON’T FIT IN
I’m a 32-year-old gay man who does not drink and party. Most of my contemporaries do.
I go to bed at around 8.30/9 PM nearly every day.
I practice meditation every day, twice.
I’m obviously very into spirituality and meditation, but I’m not attracted to many of the typical “spiritual ways”. I.e. admiring the practices of the East, Spiritualism and New Age without a critical eye.
I try to live by minimalistic principles as possible.
I treasure and create as much stillness and peace as possible.
I don’t need a lot of variety or social engagement to find life satisfaction, as I know the most meaningful comes from within and helping others.
I don’t have a massive pull towards typical travel. I think there is something in experiencing a wide range of cultures; at the same time, openness and curiosity can be cultivated in other ways.
Success to me does not look like being able to afford expensive places to live, expensive clothes and other overly expensive materialistic ways. I have no pull, nor do I think I would if there was more money in my bank account.
Success to me looks like managing to stay open, curious and calm in the face of adversity.
The list above is mine, and yours might be entirely different, and that is okay. As I mature and experience more, the list might also change. We are all different, with different values, needs, wants and desires.
Further, I’m not suggesting that my way is the way forward; how boring would it be if we all lived the same way? On the other hand, I am suggesting that you sit with yourself and reflect on what a life of authenticity looks like to you.
I’m curious: what is keeping you from living your authenticity?
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