Love and other reflections
I have been single for over six years now, I believe. During that time, I dated some lovely people. However, what often got in the way is that I have fully embraced a life of stillness, slowness, and a daily practice of inwardness.
I love my practices of inwardness: meditation, stretching, journaling, breathwork, emotional availability and so on. My experience is that most gay men my age live a life of drinking and visiting a new restaurant every weekend. Not that there is anything strictly wrong with that; it’s just not compatible with how I intentionally choose to live my life. And it is okay! I still occasionally enjoy going out dancing and visiting a fancy restaurant, but that’s not my entire life.
I guess you could say I’m a modern monk? Ha! Jokes.
If there is one thing I have learnt, it is that you have to live your life how you want to without doing harm, of course. In particular, if you do something slightly against the grain, people will not understand; sometimes, they might even go out of their way to misunderstand.
You must stay strong to honour your boundaries and not get swayed. I believe in you.
Why am I telling you about my love life? I’m telling you about my love life to say that it is okay to be single, and it is okay to wait until you find someone who is genuinely compatible and with whom you can build a life over time.
In the meantime, work on yourself to become the person you would want to date and fill your life with hobbies and activities so that if it doesn’t work out with someone, you still have a rich life without them.
I’d actually love to have a partner; at the same time, I’m willing to wait until I come across the person who is ready to go to the depths with me and hold that experience together. That is a high bar, making the pool rather small; at the same time, I’m not willing to compromise on certain things. I’d rather be alone.
I’m not sure if I believe in soulmates and twin flames. At least not how they are framed on Reddit. Yet, I believe having a deep, intuitive spiritual connection is important to reach a profound sense of depth.
I also think we put too much stock in ‘forever’. While it’s important to be loyal and figure out the relationship dynamic that works for you, giving partners the freedom to grow is crucial- sometimes, that means growing apart. As always, everything comes down to mutual honesty, respect, and healthy communication.
No one is worth less because a relationship did not work out.
All it means is that a new chapter is beginning.
My motto in life is that everything is temporary and everything comes to an end.
I’ll be writing more on love, relationships and communication, as these are essential building blocks for a fulfilling life.
UPCOMING CLASSES:
BOOK A ONE-TO-ONE
OTHER PLACES YOU CAN FIND ME